The (Seemingly) Eternal Search for the Mature One

We've all been through it. The relationships that deteriorate because the other person is too immature to date or marry. They let the small things tear you apart; they become jealous of your ex, they suffer through sexual insecurity, they get angry at the wrong things, and they don't know how to properly communicate in order to work through issues. Either complete silence or yelling and anger seem to be their ideal forms of communication

So, we go on the hunt - the eternal search for the one that is mature enough to handle a relationship. Many of us believe that we must date someone who is older in order to find this. However, this become a problem within itself.

First, how do we know that just because someone is older, they are more mature? I've seen my fair share of older men that behave like neanderthals and treat those pursuing after him like pieces of llama shit. (In a future blog, I want to focus on why women and gay men are always drawn to these a-holes with whom their future is bleak; or non-existent.) This is not a general rule of thumb, and all men should generally be treated equal. We all mature at different ages, and it is never a guarantee that just because we have more wrinkles or gray in our hair that we'll treat you better or understand you moreso.

Secondly, and more importantly, if you do happen to find an older man who IS more mature, are YOU ready to potentially be the immature one? I've been on both sides of this fence, and trust me - there is no winning or better side. If you're younger and less mature, you must be humble enough to learn from your significant other; otherwise, you become the type of person from which you are escaping.... the naive, proud, young, immature know-it-all.

So, to make this point (and this blog) short and clear - be careful that you know what you're wanting. Be prepared to be both the mature and the immature one at points in your life. Be humble, quicker to listen than to speak, and slow to anger. Every obstacle in this life is an amazing opportunity for growth and education - don't let it be a trap that sucks you in and wears you down by being too prideful. Pride, just like alcohol (in my mind) is good - but only in moderation. In excess, you're left looking like a jackass - and likely to go home with the asshole that just wants to get laid.